Help & Support

Click on your location to view contacts and resources for domestic violence and abuse.

• New Zealand
• Pacific Islands 
• Australian Capital Territory
• Northern Territory
• New South Wales
• Queensland
• South Australia
• Tasmania
• Victoria
• Western Australia

How to Help Someone Who is Being Abused

1. Listen and don't judge the victim or abuser. Take the report seriously no matter how important or powerful the abuser is.
2. Show that you care and pray with them. Presenting their case, ask God for help and wisdom for them to make the right decision. Believe He has heard you and claim His promises to defend and save the oppressed. Thank God for hearing and answering.
3. Find as many options of help in the community that you can.
   • Look for a Domestic Violence service.
   • Present the options to them, and help by listening as they explore them.
   • Pray with them as they consider them, asking God for guidance.
   •  Encourage them to tell a doctor so that any injuries can be documented.
   • Remind them that domestic violence is a serious crime and the police and courts can provide help in these situations.
4. It will be a very difficult and dangerous time for them - so continue to listen and indicate that you understand them. They will be fearful. Claim God's peace, protection and freedom from fear.
5. Whatever decision they make, whether to stay or leave, support them non-judgementally. Only they fully know the danger of their situation. Be careful to keep confidentiality.
6. Consider the rights and needs of children separately.

What Does the Bible Say About Abuse?

• God's word condemns violence in personal relationships.
  (Gen 6:11-13; Ps 11:5; Isa 58:4,5; Rom 13:10; Gal 5:19-21)
  
  
• It is the spirit of Christ to love and accept, to affirm and build others up rather than to abuse or demean them.
  (Rom 12:10; 14:19; Eph 4:26; 5:28,29; Col 3: 8-14; 1 Thes 5:11)
  
  
• There is no room among Christ's followers for tyrannical control and abuse of power.
  (Matt 20:25-28; Eph 6:4)

God has given us examples in the Bible so there may be no mistake about what He thinks.

• When the earth became "filled with violence" and everyone's possible thoughts were only evil on a continual basis, God was sorry He had made man, "it grieved him at his heart." They chose not to believe His offer of salvation and all but eight drowned.
  
  
• The sexual violence of the people of Sodom and Gomorrah (" their sin is very grievous,") brought about their destruction.
  
  
• The Egyptian's brutal slavery of God's people and refusal to recognise the inalienable rights that God has given, ultimately led to the plagues and their drowning in the Red Sea.
  
  
• When the tribe of Benjamin harboured abusive rapists who brutally gang raped a man's wife to death, God told Israel to destroy the tribe of Benjamin. Israel swore not to allow their daughters to marry the 600 men that were alive.

The gospel is God's rehabilitation program for sinners/abusers and the Church is to be a refuge for victims.

What does the Bible Recommend?

1. An overlooked principle is, "Wives submit yourselves unto your husbands as it is fit in the Lord." (Eph. 5:22) and Children, obey your parents in the Lord for this is right." (Eph 6:1). Wives and children are to obey husbands and parents within the parameters of God's will.
   
   
2. As the Israelite slaves demonstrated, if we are being controlled or abused by someone, we may be unable to render free loving service to God. To strive and seek for freedom is a desire God puts in our hearts. For "where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty" (2 Cor. 3:17). When the Israelite slaves cried to God, recognising His ownership of them above their slave masters, God heard, came down and freed them.
   
   
3. There is a moral aspect to marriage, but also a civil aspect. Abuse is incivility and earthly governments usually protect people from incivility. (Romans 13:3,4)